


Tongue of Silver, Heart of Stone

by faikitty



Category: Tales of Xillia
Genre: Angst, Character Study, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-17
Updated: 2014-06-17
Packaged: 2018-02-22 15:55:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2513408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faikitty/pseuds/faikitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>From an ask/request: "He wanted to tell him how much he loved him, but..."</p>
    </blockquote>





	Tongue of Silver, Heart of Stone

**Author's Note:**

> From an ask/request: "He wanted to tell him how much he loved him, but..."

Physical affection. For some, it’s a far easier thing than expressing feelings through speech.

Alvin is one of those people. His tongue may be made of silver, but it doesn’t seem to fit quite right in his mouth. He simply isn’t comfortable around many people, even if his laidback attitude gives him a sort of welcoming appearance. Even if he didn’t  _have_  to leave Jude’s group of friends (because that’s what they are; Jude’s friends, not his) from time to time, he would make up some sort of excuse to slip out.

 

Besides, he doesn’t want to be around  _Jude_  so much. Because he  _is_  comfortable around the boy, far more comfortable than he has been with anyone in a very long time.

And that isn’t something he needs.

So why it is that he continues to follow Jude more closely than he does Maxwell is beyond him, but he still does it. When his ultimate goal will have to come at the price of Milla’s death, he refuses to grow affectionate with her. It will be a difficult enough task anyway. At least Jude is a bit safer.

_Or_   _not_ , he thinks he gazes at Jude’s back, his form silhouetted by the brilliant sunset above the sea.

They’d arrived in Lakutam Seahaven a few hours ago with the sole intention to spend the night, but Jude had wandered off, saying he wanted to watch the sunset while there. Alvin, for his part, had sneaked past Milla and the others and ducked out to exchange a message with his employers.

The fact that he came across Jude is pure coincidence, as is the fact that he ordered two hot drinks instead of one.

"Hey, kid," Alvin greets from a few feet back. Jude drags his eyes away from the fading light and smiles as they land on the older man’s face. "Thought you could use something to warm up. It gets chilly out here once the sun goes down."

Jude accepts the offered drink with a nod, gingerly sipping from the edge. “Thank you.” He slides over a few spaces and gives Alvin room to sit, and the mercenary does so. “I didn’t expect you to be out tonight.”

"What can I say? I’m full of surprises."

Jude rolls his eyes at the teasing and looks back at the small remaining sliver of sun.

Sitting there in the slowly darkening light, watching Jude take absentminded sips from his drink, Alvin is struck by how easy it would be to swipe the cup from his hands and replace the touch of hot liquid with warm lips.

Right then, right there, he could reveal  _everything_. Part of him thinks that if he had Jude’s heart, he wouldn’t  _need_  to return to Elympios.

Alvin wants to tell him how much he loves him, but he doesn’t.

It would be breaking the character he’s taken so much care to form. If he told Jude he loves him, while having full knowledge that his feelings aren’t returned, it would be his worst betrayal yet.

But  _god_ , Jude is beautiful in the gray of dusk, the breeze flowing over the sea making his bangs dance across his forehead lazily. The corners of his mouth are turned up ever so slightly in a relaxed, content smile. The mercenary wants to kiss them, to follow their path up to Jude’s temples.

But he doesn’t.

Alvin forces the thoughts into the cobweb covered boxes in the back of his head. He shoves the warmth Jude conjures in his chest down through his veins and out of his mouth when he lets out a long breath.

Although Jude doesn’t seem inclined to break the comfortable silence, and Alvin doesn’t  _want_  to, the older man knows he has little choice. ”Come on. Let’s go to bed,” he says a little more loudly than he meant to. Jude starts and looks at him curiously when he stands.

"Go on without me. I’m not tired." Jude returns his gaze to the horizon where stars are starting to twinkle just above the sea.

Alvin rubs at the back of his neck. “You gotta rest. Milla wants to leave early tomorrow, and I  _know_  you don’t wanna slow her down.”

The way Jude’s eyes glow at the sound of Maxwell’s name, lit by more than just streetlamps and faint starlight, makes Alvin’s heart jump into his throat. He swallows it down, pushes back the jealousy and the incessant thoughts of  _why doesn’t_ my _name make him do that?_  and turns his back on the doctor. “Don’t blame me when you get left behind,” he calls, ambling away with his hands in his pockets.

Sure enough, Jude appears by his side moments later, and Alvin slings an arm over his shoulders as they walk, because it’s easier than talking.


End file.
